FIVE FACES OF BULLYINGIn the Professional Development Resource “The Bully Around the Corner: Changing Brains –Changing Behaviours” there are, especially in the description of the Nine Types of Bullies the realization to be gained that Bullying does indeed have Five Faces. But because many of the faces are hidden or at least obscured it is possible for observers, except the victims to misconstrue, what is happening and what might be done to remedy the situation.
1 REPEATED BULLYING BEHAVIORS:
Taunting, hitting, beating, stalking, demeaning, shunning, stealing, coercion including sexual coercion, cyberbullying, intimidation, lying about, denigrating etc. These are the actions or types of actions that the bully takes to harm his/her victim
2 SELF JUSTIFICATION OF BEHAVIORS:
Different - skin colour or skin tone, religion, ethnic background, intelligence (too much to little), gender, gender orientation, facial features, size and shape (too big, too small), language usage and skills, different skills such as athletic skills etc. Children and senior students may be targeted when they aspire above their “supposed station” on life. While these justifications may be held in a non-conscious manner they are liable to become more external when a clique decides to bully another person or a selected group of persons.
3 EMOTIONAL SUPPORTING AND DRIVING FORCES;
Emotional supporting and driving forces: Hate, fear, anger, impulsivity, poor attachments, insecurities, neglect, need to control, status issues, PTSD, bigotry, unwillingness to take calculated risks, reaction to academic difficulties, memories of abuse etc.
NOTE 1. There is an addictive nature to bullying. The highs bullies get when exercising power or control over another can re-enforce the desire to do this again.
NOTE 2. Cognitive immaturity may be a factor only to the extent that the pre-frontal cortex is limited in its ability to provide control over the more impulsive emotional brain. This may change with age or it may be a life long condition.
NOTE 3. The most dangerous bully is the one devoid empathy and without conscience. This person is often driven to satisfy a “quirky” obsession and may harm or kill others in the process. This person may kill to get a high.
4 DISCIPLINE, REMEDIATIONS AND INTERVENTION
Remediations and interventions: Every bully is different to every other bully. No two bullies are alike - or even similar. The challenge is to grasp the nature of the child’s attitudes and behaviours, assess the support available and required and begin a process that may be as short as one or two sessions or one as long as six months and requires persons with certain specialized skills.
Few bullies are able to resolve the issues without at least some help.
5. THE VICTIMS:
The victims of bullying are almost without exception the unwilling participant in a bullying activity. They are the target of the bully’s need to act in a dysfunctional harmful manner. The general rule is that victims are seen to be vulnerable because of size, isolation (including lacking social connections), being different in some way, seemingly less assertive or aggressive, being intelligent or having academic disabilities etc. In fact, if a bully wants to target someone he/she will find a “reason” or justification.
Victims tend to be punished more than their bully harassers. Victims tend to go “over board” ie. they “go postal”. Unless one has been victimized it is difficult to understand the pain and suffering they endure. Some don’t endure! Some do endure and prosper and they frequently choose not to employ people who bullied them or members of their families. Other victims become bullies. But many victims carry some of their scars for a life time. Most victims could benefit from some well thought out and well delivered therapy.
Once again The Bully Around the Corner covers the topic of bullying from a multiplicity of perspectives. There are no “magic potions” nor should there be. People don’t develop that way and they don’t change that way. There are very real solutions
Buy "THE BULLY AROUND THE CORNER" NOW and find the solutions to help you.
A bully is like an iceberg = you see only 10% but the most damage is done by the unseen 90%
We've all met them - clear proof bullies don't "grow out of it"
|CANADIAN PRICE, $39.95. INCLUDES GST, postage & packing|
|USA PRICE $40.95CDN INCLUDES postage & packing|
|INTERNATIONAL $57.50 CDN INCLUDES postage & packing|
SUPPLEMENT TO THE BULLY
|"The Bully Around the Corner"
& the "Road Map"
supplement. $55.90 CDN
INCLUDES POSTAGE & PACKING
THIS IS A LIMITED TIME OFFER AND IS LIABLE TO CHANGE WITHOUT NOTICE!
Teachers! Will you be dealing with Bullies this school year?
Parents! Is your child being bullied or do you suspect he/she is bullying others?
Are you dealing with a bully(ies) in the workplace?
If so, this is the book you must have in order to cope.
Understand how a Bully's brain works and what made it develop that way. Use the strategies in this book to gain the confidence to handle any bullying situation.
Does the bully have the upper hand when you try to intervene?
Bullies are often manipulative and will try to weasel out of taking responsibility. "The Bully Around the Corner.." has "scripts" on what to say to a bully and, more importantly, what not to say. For example, why you MUST never say .........
(Sorry, you'll have to buy the book to find out)
"The Bully Around the Corner identifies 9 bully types and includes case studies for each bully type. Discover what makes bullies bully. Uncover multiple brain facts and even more strategies then use these invaluable strategies to combat bullying, violence, harassment and aggression wherever it occurs.
Researched & written by David Halstead M.Ed, (The Brain Guy) international authority on Bullying and the Brain.